Wednesday, September 23, 2009

2009 09 23. Wednesday.

Left for AIMS (Amma's big hospital in Cochin) this morning to have the doctor look at my pinkie. I was able to get on an express train. Cool. Only 2 hours. Did some chanting and meditation. Was feeling frustrated this morning about the whole incident with Kandre; running over in my mind all the things I could have said. Usual ego-mind stuff. Got to AIMS. Doctor said my finger is healing OK; be careful and come back in 2 weeks. Will do, Doc. Left the hospital and popped into the internet cafe to catch up on emails and write up some blog entries.

Was feeling depressed in the evening. Frustrated with my finger healing very slowly and not able to do a lot of things. Also I sometimes feel down when I'm away from the ashram and not surrounded by all those wonderful and wacky fellow Amma devotees. When I'm out in the regular world I don't feel their support. Also the ashram environment is a strong support for my daily discipline of practice and seva. Outside the ashram I'll spend hours on the internet getting caught up on things. I'm pretty good about not wasting any time when I get on the net, but getting out of my usual routine can throw me off emotionally.

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